Monday, June 25, 2012

Before, During, After, Beyond: Part 2 *During*

For me, this is what it is like During the adoption of your child ~

During the adoption, things are electric.

During is a rush of blood like 
a never ending white water rafting trip,
waves which grow with foam endlessly breaking
 over the boat but always mercifully retreating.
During leaves you breathless.

During is fierce moments.

Way back Before things might have been clear -
the flames had certainly been stoking -
but During the adoption
 the fire ignites.

A fire naturally fascinates so During the adoption
 a crowd assembles:
 there are surveyors, 
there are spectators, 
and there are supporters.

The Voice which you heard booming in the night, 
which commanded you to "GO!"
keeps you connected to Him - to your Jesus,
your boots rooted to the original plan of obedience
by your evolving awareness of His sustaining grace.

During is a whirlwind.
During is a cotton candied
 cloud-filled bliss of weightlessness.
During is communion with God.

There is struggle.
There is passion, fervor, ardor. 
Before? Oh, Before was enthusiasm
but During there is devotion.
There is now connection where there was only concept.
There is now reality where there was only romanticism.

Before was magic but During 
 becomes supernatural.
During the adoption there is
a choir
melding seamlessly into a single tone.

Finally During the adoption there is unity
and you can grin at that shadow called Before.

Before was warmth --- but During is heat.
During is beauty.
During is revelation.
During is speed, immediacy, gratification.

 During is a realization of dreams.


During splits your heart open and though you are distracted by glee
you glimpse it around the bend...

tomorrow is up ahead and it is not void.

During leads to what comes After.


  1. Wow Esty, this is really beautiful. And so perfectly descriptive of the experience. I love enthusiasm, then devotion and magic, then supernatural. You have a wonderful way with words!!

  2. Hey Esty--

    You are a poet! I love your metaphors and images that speak so powerfully to this whole experience.

    We leave for China in TWO DAYS to get our boy. Lord willing, Ren in will be in our arms in six days. I am so ready to transition from the BEFORE to the DURING phase. As you put it, I'm ready for "concept" to yield to "connection" and "romanticism" to yield to "reality." Ready for the fire to ignite!

    Thanks for sharing this...looking forward to reading the next one.

    Love, Lib.