Sunday, April 17, 2011

The Very Beginning

I'm sleeping.
I'm Far Away in a dream where I'm trying to get my kids into bed but these aren't their beds and they're not even my kids, really.
It's a frustrating dream but I stomp through it, annoyed but sleeping soundly.

A whisper catches my ear and drags me from my dreamy mission of bed-arranging:
"Where are the Embassy forms?"

Wait - what?
Am I still dreaming?
Do I need Embassy forms in my dream?
What now?
I stumble out of the dream and grunt something like: 

"Where are the Embassy forms?"

It's 3:55AM. 
Andrew is awake.
His brain is already firing
and he wants to know where I have packed the Embassy forms in our luggage.
I'm dreaming about random bedroom furniture placement
and he's beside me, 
not sleeping,  
thinking through a packing list.
The soft American bed I am laying in is already devolving from Magical Land of Dreams into
wrinkled bed linens.
The box fan I hear humming is suddenly too loud and I can barely think straight.

"Good morning to you, too", I mutter.
"They are in your carry-on in the folder with the dossier."

"Let's go get our daughter", he grins in the semi-darkness.

A switch flips in my heart.
Lightbulbs snap on in all corners of my head
and my heart races.

Today. Now. NOW.


  1. Chills!! I remember that day when we were leaving for Ethiopia like it was yesterday!! I can't wait for pictures!! Blessings, friend!!

  2. Loved praying for you this morning! Hope you are enjoying your cozy seat and yummy airline food. :) Can't wait for you to begin your snuggle time with Rissa! :)

  3. You are SO on my heart today!!!! Praying for strength, stamina, health, comfort, AMAZING JOY.

  4. My beautiful Esty - I am so proud of you and your precious Andrew. You know that I know, the blessing is not only for Rissa but for you! But your choice to follow God's heart has changed her life and the lives of her children for all eternity! I'm so proud of you and love you! Can't wait to see her little face!!! Love you, Vickie

  5. BRING. IT. ON.

    So excited! I love this post. Praying for you.

  6. Oh wow....cannot wait to hear about your adventures with Rissa and your whole family!

  7. Oh my gosh! I'm just getting on here and finally catching up! What's the latest?!?!?!

  8. Hi - my husband and I along with a board of directors just launched a nonprofit last month (The Sparrow Fund - to give grants to adoptive families. We are trying to get adoptive families who blog to post about it to spread the word. If you have any interest, can you email me? We'd love to have you!